* Note to My Readers: Due to the busyness of the next month and a half, I'm making a few minor changes to my schedule of posting. All posts will continue to be made daily and will consist of material that has not appeared before on this blog. However, because my time will be taken up by my final thesis defense for my Master of Church History degree and by a trip to the Holy Land, several of my ongoing series will be on hold until May.

- On Wednesdays, I'll be posting some of my original poems from my college years, and then in May my "Evangeliad" poems will resume.

- On Thursdays, my series on "How to Be Miserable in Your Christian Life" will wrap up by the end of March. That will conclude that series for now; however, if you enjoyed it, please let me know, because I may add more to it at some later point.

- And on Fridays, my "Glimpses of Grace" series will be on hiatus until May. In the meantime, it will be replaced with a serialized, unpublished novella that I wrote back in 2005, "Worth It All." Beginning in the first week of May, "Glimpses of Grace" will return, this time in the Thursday slot, and a newly-composed adventure novel will be posted on Fridays.

Wednesday, March 30, 2016

A Poem about Searching for Answers in the Midst of Doubt

The poem below was written several years ago, when I was going through a period of wrestling with some intellectual doubts about the veracity of the Christian faith. I haven't shared it publicly until now because there tends to be a stigma against any expression of doubt in evangelical Christian experience. I think that stigma is shameful and misplaced: looking back now, I can see that God was working in and through my doubts to shake me out of some of the narrow limitations of my earlier preconceptions, and guide me toward a deeper, richer, and more ancient faith. So, although I'm no longer walking "in vales of uncertainty," I offer this poem as an encouragement toward perseverance to any who find themselves on a similar journey.


In vales of uncertainty
I dare not tread, but must,
And ne’er forget I am a shell
Of oxygen and dust.

I watch my friends, who never face
The specter of a doubt,
Whose lives are confidence on fire:
Ablaze within, without.

I see the faith that fuels each step,
That underspeaks each smile;
How blessed and how simple, yes,
The unencumbered mile!

Yet miles I walk, not one, not two,
And under burdens fierce—
Long leagues of twilight and of stars
While broken, wounded, pierced.

Yes, I will scour the universe
Until I reach my goal:
To find the Truth beyond all truths,
And drink it down all whole;

I am no master of this quest;
A wounded seeker, I;
But I press on, unflagging now,
Into the endless light.

When finally I stand alone
Before the throne of truth,
I will embrace it from my knees,
Amazed and deeply moved.

I did not want this toilsome road,
But walk it, yes, I must,
Rememb’ring that I am a shell
Of oxygen and dust.

No comments: