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Friday, July 04, 2008

This Is Why I Wander

Lord,
I love this quiet road,
But it is not an easy one to walk.
They don't always understand
Why I want to be alone,
Why I don't always join
In their beautiful revelry.
Sometimes I wish I could.
Sometimes I wish I was like them--
Always having a word on my tongue
And a smile on my lips.
They know how to talk,
And I know how to listen.
And in truth, I like listening to them.
But it's a hard path,
To be ever knowing others
And yet never fully known.
You have reserved these quiet spaces
For Yourself alone,
And I don't begrudge You the place.
I love the way You've made me.
But there is always a part of me
That they will never see,
And that is difficult.
I want them to know me.
And still, I wonder.
I wonder if they know
What it is they're missing.
Can they too walk
These paths of wonder
Which You've set out for me?
Can they see the wild horizon
Of the breaking dawn
Within a turn of phrase?
Can a song or a word or a single thought
Open for them new worlds
Of bright and hopeful skies?
Can they smell life in the air,
The joy of all things
In the silent places of the earth?
Can they kneel down
And, in a moment's time,
Feel Your touch so deeply
That they want to laugh
And cry
And dance for joy?
Do they ever find that their feet want to fly,
Unable to restrain the delight
Of a wild, restless heart?
Do they taste adventure in the breeze,
Your kiss in every moment?
Oh, give me the blue horizon!
Give me a silent corner of eternity,
Quiet enough to hear Your voice!
I love that solace,
And though others may not understand,
I need it.
Why do I want to be alone?
Because this is where You meet me.
This is where I am seen and known
For who I really am.
You have set me apart for Yourself alone,
And I cannot rest for long
If I am not at rest in You.
Perhaps they meet You
In the company of friends,
In the sacrament of laughter
And the grace of mutual love.
And I too have seen You there at times.
But this--this is where I always find You,
On the wild, lonely path
Of a silent heart,
Bursting with joy that the world will never see.
Perhaps You smile at this secret we share,
This sweet delight which You ordained
To be only here, between us.
I laugh with You like with no one else.
I seldom dance, but I always dance for You.
This is why I wander,
Because my wandering always brings me home,
And I am home with You.

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